Grump.

It's on days like this that I know I'm nowhere close to being ready to be a mom.  I still don't know how to divide my energy between working full-time, working out, washing dishes, grocery shopping and running other errands, doing laundry, cooking (as much as I can), keeping the house clean, studying for the bar exam (somewhat important), and trying to find "me time" somewhere in between (usually at the gym).  Oh, yeah, and trying to be a sweet wife.  And attempting to keep up with friends and family -- though I suppose finding/having girlfriends in Carson would probably help my sanity instead of hurt it.  Maybe it's just not possible to do it all, but I haven't come to that conclusion yet. 

But just one thing can tip me out of balance.  Yesterday, that was getting sick from some lunch I picked up, and it resulted in a grumpy me all day today.  All the mundane tasks that didn't get done last night stood out to me: the growing grocery list on the fridge, the dirty dishes in the sink, the crumbs left on the counter, the expired food smelling/crowding up the fridge.  Plus, we're out of coffee (how in the world that happened, I don't know).  I can't imagine coming home on days like this and mustering up the care and love that children deserve from their mom.

Where do I find balance?  It's out there somewhere...right?  You would think I would have found it by now.

Grump, grump, grump...